Just One?

A bright red maple, a new word game, and thoughts on solo dining and connection.

Our brilliant maple tree

What a difference a week makes! Our maple tree is mostly free of leaves now, but a week ago it was rather brilliant. Cool, right?

I have to start off by plugging Sixtep, my friend Ty Finck’s new iPhone game (coming soon to Android). He wrote a great email about it, and you can learn more on the official site at sixtep.com. In short, if you like Wordl, you’re probably going to like Sixtep. I’ve added it to my daily routine, so early mornings look a lot like this:

Mini > Wordl > Connections > Strands > Pips > Sixtep

Here’s how I reviewed it in the App Store:

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I enjoyed listening to an episode of the Choose FI podcast featuring Katie and Alan Donegan from the Rebel Finance School. Of particular interest was their monthly finance meetings, where they evaluate spending and financial goals with each other. After they’ve documented their net worth, spending, gap between income and spending, and their freedom rate (see the link for what that is) for the month, they meet and ask themselves the questions listed below. We’re trackers (tracking vs. budgeting), like them, so plan to start asking ourselves these questions, too!

1. What went well this month?

2. What did we spend a lot on?

3. What really added value to our lives?

4. What was a waste of money?

5. Where could we spend more?

6. Where could we spend less?

7. How big was our gap this month? What are 5 ideas for increasing it next month?

8. How high was our Freedom rate? What will we do to increase it next month?

9. Are we happy with the direction we are heading for each of the 4 numbers we’ve captured?

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During my last business trip, I made a few dinner reservations for myself, and I noticed something peculiar about how I was greeted at each restaurant. When you show up with a party greater than one, you’re typically greeted by the host accordingly:

• Four of you?

• Table for three?

• Two for dinner?

And then for me, my party of one, I reliably was greeted with:

Just one? Ooh, that word just well … just drips with judgment and derision. It said it right there on the reservation, party of one, but the wording of the verbal confirmation just makes me feel like I’ve disappointed the establishment right off the bat. Why not greet me with a simple “hello,” or “thank you for choosing to dine with us tonight,” — both far less judgy than “Just one?”

When I observe things like this, I don’t get mad, mind you. Sure, I’m a little put off, but moments like these often prompt me to riff on ideas for solving problems. You see, I don’t prefer to dine alone, it’s just a reality of business travel. Finding friends who are free the same nights and times I am can be a big hurdle (but I’m totally open to that, friends!), but as I looked around and saw other tables of singles in the same boat, I thought it would be cool if there was a way to take a bunch of just ones and turn them into parties of four.

You know that single-rider line in theme parks? What if restaurants had something in the same vein, where you could indicate that you were interested in sitting with other singles who had indicated the same preference? Or just a section that was like that table at a wedding where all the single people sit? One of the things I love about the run club in New York is I can just show up and talk to new people as I run. Nobody cares that I’m only there one week out of the month, and there’s no pressure because we’re just running. Same with restaurants; it’s just food, right?

But I’m not alone in this (pardon the pun). Turns out, solo dining is on the rise. There’s even a word for it in Japanese: ohitorisama, or “on your own.” Solo diners are becoming a significant segment of restaurant traffic. The condition is a choice, not a fallback, driven by the desire to try new places and enjoy alone time with good food. Cultural changes have driven the trend upward, with more people living alone, traveling for work (or working remotely), and enjoying flexible hours. Add to that the ability to easily make a solo reservation using your phone, it can be the more convenient choice. Restaurants are taking note, too, making changes to “update their design, operations, and menus to ensure these guests feel just as welcome as a table of four.” (FSR Magazine)

Curious of your thoughts on this exposition, so please do drop a comment if you’re so inclined!

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The New York City Marathon is tomorrow. Best of luck to all of the runners! I had the pleasure of running this race in 2014, and this year, more than 55,000 runners from around 150 countries are expected to participate. I took this picture of the plaque at the finish line during a group run with Central Park Run Club last month.

New York City Marathon finish line

A Tip for the Modern Worker

Expect the unexpected. When you have rigid expectations, you can be sure they’ll be unmet. At the end of an ordinary week, think back to the beginning of the week. Did the outcome align with your expectations? Likely not. When you’re flexible about your expectations, you won’t be disappointed when they’re not met. Expect the unexpected. Timelines can shift. Tasks can take longer than planned. Business deals can sour. Adjust your expectations and the unexpected might happen a little less often.

This tip is one of 365 in my Handbook for the Modern Worker. That followed my first book, The Art of Working Remotely, about my experience working from home since 1998. Depending on where you work and which way the wind is blowing, these may be banned books or fan fiction. I hope it’s the latter.

Mail Bag: If you work remotely and have come across an issue that needs solving, a thorn that needs removing, or just an observation you’d like to share, hit reply. I’d love to hear from you.